Split personality

I realize there are three parts to my conscious being; heart, head and “me”. Head and heart are mostly adversaries and “me” the referee at times. When my heart and head sing the same tune, it’s blissful. Does this ever happen? Oh yeah! Say I have a budget to shop and I mange to play within the budget AND get what I love! Know what I mean? (Yes, yes, typical girly stuff!)

There are times when my heart is like a troublesome kid, kicking and crying (wailing is more like it) for a toy that just isn’t available or affordable. No amount of reasoning or logic is going to help. How about a tight slap? My head takes charge of the situation and does just that. “Me” in me (sorry if that’s a bit convoluted) feels sorry for the heart, but lets the stronger being (of self) prevail for the sake of orderliness.

There are other instances when my head behaves like a strict matron with complete disregard to small, affordable pleas of my heart. Heart makes a sincere attempt to convince my head that it’s ok to be dressed at my best, on a day when a meeting is scheduled with a “cute” customer. If at situations like these, my head gets unduly strong-headed, my cool heart tells my head to take a hike. Life’s got to be fun at times, “me” says!

Most difficult are times when my head and heart are on long, irresolvable war. Both have their arguments and counter-arguments and just not willing to give in. “Me” confused and struggling between a practical head and an emotional heart. Sometimes, this state of my being goes on for days. “Me” is in no superior state to pass a verdict or unable to detach itself and watch the fun from a distance(like in the above instances). Heart and head are fair in their own ways and a resolve is hard to reach. When it gets out of control and ends me in a headache (or heartache), “me” takes charge and shuts one of its two co-beings and puts an end to the conflict to restore peace within.

Am I turning into a schizophrenic?