dinner date during sunnier days...

Lutyens’ Delhi is beautiful – obnoxious but beautiful.  Going from Mumbai, a city that looks like matchboxes stacked in a hurry, this part of Delhi mocks at you, humiliates you and makes you stop, look and take it in – all at once.  When an official commitment required me to spend a few days in Delhi, I decided I would go back to my old haunt and stay amidst this grandeur. 

Sometimes all it takes is one right decision, for everything to fall in place and make life look like straight out of a Karan Johar movie.  Around the same time that I was to be in Delhi, a dear friend from Chennai was visiting Delhi too.  We figured out we could squeeze in a dinner together, when we exchanged notes on our travel schedule. When he said he was going to a book a table at an award-winning restaurant that’s close to the property that I was to stay in, I didn’t think much of it – for various reasons.  I shy away from fine dining for I just don’t have the finesse or class that it takes. Secondly, I am a café kind of a woman. In ten minutes of being seated, I kick my shoes off and sit cross-legged on the couch.  Thirdly, to spend time with a friend is more important and “where” doesn’t count – gyan bhaji, I know, right!? Lastly, who knew if we would even keep the appointment; when you are traveling on work, things get planted in your schedule last minute and could throw your plans out of the window. So I kept my excitement (if any) under check. 

Cut to the appointed date (!), it seemed like it was going to happen, after all. I was a bit stressed about what to wear (duh!) and what and how to eat – I am worse than Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, when it comes to table manners. I was petrified things would fly off my plate and I would make a spectacle of myself.  I gathered myself, dabbed a bit of lipstick and a lot of confidence and stepped out of my room, ready to order an uber. The gentleman that my friend is, picks me up from the lobby and we rode in his rented car.  Suddenly I realised, how old I have grown for I haven’t been asked out on a formal dinner in a hundred years!

“Indian Accent” does total justice to all the hype, accolades and awards that it’s been receiving.  It is one of Asia’s 50 best restaurants and India’s best-kept secrets. Chef Mehrotra, dishes out love and magic in each of the six courses, that you forget your surroundings and graces and slurp away! I am not much of a foodie or even an amateur critique, sometimes I can’t tell one flavour from the other, can’t remember names of cheeses and gawk at people when they discuss exotic ingredients that go into making of a dish.  But that evening, my palate senses came alive and danced with joy during dinner and after!  Indian Accent is a must do, put it on your bucket list and go find the person who will perfectly compliment the class AND would offer to take you there. 

The little girl in me felt like she was on a trip to wonderland and much loved and pampered. May all of us be blessed with a mate like mine!

p.s: this was two years ago today, wrote it almost immediately, but didn't post it then.  Google memory nudged me to, today! :) 

also, lockdown means even more cherishing of such memories

if you think you are the good guy, act like one!

Last weekend, a friend sent me a link to a podcast and the host was Joe Rogan. Since then, YouTube has been suggesting me Joe Rogan’s other interviews. One of the suggestions that piqued my interest was Joe Rogan interviewing Jordan Peterson. I have been intrigued by this Peterson guy for some years now. Please note this post is not really about Peterson, but stay with me for some dope on him.

Jordon Peterson seems to feel strongly against people who are fighting to uphold social justice. He groups them into a category called “postmodern neo marxism” - make what you would, of it. He openly and vehemently opposed gender-neutral pronouns becoming a law (Bill C-16) under the pretext that it takes away his linguistic freedom. Who is to say his freedom is more important than the freedom of transgenders in how they want to be addressed!?

Peterson says gender inequality is a non-issue; his argument is men and women are made differently. Women are more agreeable, so are naturally attracted to nurturing jobs while men are curious (or something to that effect) so they are more STEM oriented. Even in Nordic countries where they seem to have won over gender issues, 80% of nursing jobs are held by women while 80% of engineering jobs are held by men (his stats, not mine). According to this college professor, if women are in low paying jobs, it’s not so much the nurture (read anomaly) as it’s the nature. Wah, Professor!

He has similar pearls of wisdom on pay gaps, how the oppressed gain moral high ground, while life is difficult for everyone (I see how difficult it must be - that job of oppressing!). This man is articulate, convincing, sounds scientific, has been a teacher, turns to Bible to support his arguments and wears the hat of a preacher too. One of the rules from his book “12 Rules for life” is “Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world”. What if the world is, in a way responsible for the chaos or loss of order in someone’s house? I don’t think he wants to entertain that perspective.

Anyway, let's get back to Joe Rogan’s podcast that features Jordan Peterson. Both these men kept going back to a Channel 4 interview, from a couple of years ago, where Cathy Newman was the interviewer. I recollect, that interview was almost Peterson’s claim to fame. I had seen it when it went viral and heard Jordan Peterson for the first time, probably. Cathy was trying to engage him on pay gaps and gender inequality when it came to top jobs; our man just rubbished them without losing his cool and smiling all through. Cathy was losing it, quite obviously.

I am coming to the point of this post, finally. There are people who don’t view social justice like some of us do. In an argument both parties quickly put the other in neatly labeled boxes – “capitalist”, “socialist” “arm-chair activist”, “protestors” and so on. These protests, the voices - that remind us of our privileges probably trigger something unpleasant for some. The voice that stands up for the vulnerable, the George Floyds, seem to assume a moral high ground with people who would rather not have that unpleasantness awakened. Some moral high grounders also seem to adopt a tone of holier than thou, provoking the peacefully privileged.

This is what Cathy Newman did. She had notions about Peterson even before she walked into that interview. She didn’t agree with his take on some of the social issues that she felt strongly about. She knew his views, she didn’t probe into his reasoning just because she didn’t agree with them and she was visibly angry; though he was being assholish (in his views) he was measured and his language, very polished. This may have triggered her further and the trolls had a field day pulling Cathy down.

Often, I wonder or even angered at how blind some people are, to such obvious inequality and social injustice. When I vehemently argue, my (unintended) message could be, “I am sensitive and you are selfish”. However, what is obvious to me need not be viewed in the same proportion or even in the same direction by others. This is reality!

No matter how passionate one is about a cause, if we don’t take away anger from the equation, there is a fair chance you will be a called an activist or socialist and you may even be made to feel responsible (even if only slightly) for what happened in Venezuela or Timbaktu. This is even more frustrating, because all that you felt was empathy for a section of people.

If you have to talk about social issues, keep cool. If you don’t, it’s pretty much a soliloquy.

This is more a note to self!

p.s: after i wrote this piece, I heard Dr. Peterson is critically ill and undergoing some experimental treatment in Moscow. I wish him a speedy recovery...