Over the extended weekend, I attended a wedding in the
friemily; probably my first elaborate one in Bombay – spreading over several
ceremonies and celebrations.
Wedding is a culmination of two hearts and in Indian
context, it is also an awkward coming together of two families; more mixed the
marriage is, more is the awkward quotient.
But this makes weddings more effective in shrinking (read uniting)
our country, which is so huge (and divided) in terms of its culture, traditions
and languages. I am digressing, though.
I was going to write about who hogs the limelight in a wedding.
Women sashaying, with their silks rustling and diamonds
glittering, men not to be left behind in their Nehru / Modi jackets and dhotis
in varying styles OR satin pocket squares matching their wives' saree colours, giggles and guffaws of young friends of the
bride and groom, crowding the corners, where everyone is looking for someone, aroma of flower and food wafting through the air and the happy mayhem gets
you lost, you ask an important question.
Who is the VIP in these ceremonies?
Did I hear you say, the bride? No, she isn’t; not by a mile. She
is busy trying to keep up with a hundred ceremonies, attires to go with it and
her hairdo and makeup. She is not thinking beyond the next event that she has
to get ready for. Is it the groom,
then? In middle of a dozen celebrations
and given the male impatience (that’s
sexism! Nonetheless, most of you would agree!?), he is busy questioning his sanity, having signed up for this. Parents?
Don’t even get them started.
The ghoda wala,
dholak wala, footwear thieves (from both sides, no less!) are all mild
disruptors – trying to steal the show for a moment or for an hour. The real
showstopper in a wedding, is the photographer (photographer"s" in most cases). There are a million
photos taken (not counting the photos on cell phones) from various angles, action
replayed, priests and ceremonies interrupted, people (who are genuinely interested
in witnessing the ceremony) pushed out of the way - so that photos can be taken - which maybe revisited (on an average) once every 5 years by a bored family
member. Maybe!
Since when did the tail start wagging the dog? Are photos
becoming more important than the moment that’s being celebrated? I know, I
know, it’s not just in the weddings. Our
lives now revolve around recording more than living (such as my indulgence in
writing this piece). When I got married, (agreed, that was a long time ago) and in my mulk, the photographer’s territory
ended just where the priest’s started.
The almost always angry and perennially rushed priest, wouldn’t have any
of the retakes and replays that the photographer constantly demands today. Those were also the live-thro-the-drudgeries
days and not the click-and-share days (which yours truly is guilty of, most
often).
Time to delve into what is the real utility of these photos other
than the best ones serving as your DPs and adorning your walls (virtual, mind
you!). While at it, I am going to tell, anyone who would listen, that
photographers are hired by the family and not the other way round.
Here’s to more magical moments and less madness of bombarding the cloud with cool pics!
